Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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