YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
