he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
