Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
pray to the hookup gods
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Randomize
