Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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