I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
It's like God shit irony all over that family
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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