How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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