just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize