Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
