I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
