no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I feel like abortions should bother me more
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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