I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize