Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
