dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
