Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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