What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
