if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Im part way to drunk.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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