She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
