it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Randomize
