Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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