I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
