Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
