The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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