so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
