Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
