It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
