I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
