You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
