I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
