Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
