too bad you live with your parents still
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize