i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Randomize
