we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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