There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
