I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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