2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
