i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
