How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I want to be your penis for a week.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
