At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
