I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
you had me at cake vodka
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize