we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize