Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Randomize
