The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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