i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize