Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
this must be what syphilis tastes like
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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