what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Randomize
