Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize