hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize