i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Randomize
