She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
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