I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
