Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
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