dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
